Nerdy Girl's Gym Commandments: Things not to do at the gym

Here's a handy guide of some of the top 10 worst offenses at the gym. Here's what not to do:

1. Dress inappropriately. This includes showing your ass cheeks, plumbers crack or forgetting to wear a sports bra. Also don't wear too tight clothes—pants in particular. No one wants to see the outline of your lady parts. Wear a size up if your compression pants are too tight, or find a long shirt. (Just say no to camel toe.)

2. Hog the instructors time. Asking a question when you need to is fine, but make sure others get a chance too. If you really need individualized attention, hire a personal trainer.

3. Try to teach the class yourself. Unless you're on the payroll, you don't need to loudly critique the instructor or walk over to the other side of the room and show someone else a move. Don't be loud and obnoxious. You may have good intentions, but let the teacher teach. Feel free to quietly show a friend a move they're having trouble with or at the break pull the teacher aside to say "I'm having trouble hearing you, maybe we should turn the music down." But don't add your two cents about every move and worse yet tell someone how to do something wrong. After all, it probably doesn't hurt to be on the instructor's good side, and undermining their class isn't a good way to start.

4. Talk or laugh the whole time. The instructors want you to have a good time. You don't have to be silent, but don't be disruptive either. Laugh when you need to. Tell your friend a quick comment, but you don't need to fill a 45 minute class with 45 minutes of chatter.

5. Be an exercise hypochondriac and have a different injury every class. I did this my first year of cross country. I was making excuses to get out of working out. I see people do this all the time. And they loudly tell the instructor they're hurt (this is good), but every day it's something else. And in the middle of class they want to know how to stretch their toe, low back, hip flexor etc. And it wouldn't be that much of an issue if it wasn't every class. If you're hurt, it's your decision whether to come or not. But don't be obnoxious, disruptive or whiney about it. Silently, sit out those exercises you can't do.

6. Not try. Sitting out an exercise or two is no problem. Some things aren't for everyone or you might have an injury. But don't come to a class and sit there. You can for a reason. Exercise. Try it once or twice before you quit.

7. Complain loudly the whole time. Sure, we all hate burpees and a little whining is expected, but you don't need to be a drama queen about every aspect of the workout. (This is not a reality show, where you do the voiceover.)

8. Show up late to the class. Emergencies, bad traffic—things happen. Try not to be late, but if you are, slip in as stealthy as possible. Some classes lock the door when they start and some classes you can wander in when they're half-way over. But don't barge in and LOUDLY apologize. That will disrupt the flow of class. If you must, slip in, and hope you can catch on/ a friend will help you out. Again, some places are stricter about this than others.

9. Not wiping off equipment. Yuck. No one wants to do sit-ups in a pool of your sweat. Bring a towel. Be courteous.

10. Make the gym smell like Bath & Body works. There are enough smells at the gym without adding Apple Blossom and Lavender to the mix. Sure, put on lotion, but you don't need the whole bottle.

Honorable mentions
• Working out while sick. If you have germs and you're circuit training and everyone is using the same kettle bells that's a good way to get a lot of your friends sick. Stay home if your'e contagious.
• Eating a huge meal before a hard workout. Blowing chunks will not impress the instructors or your classmates.

I see all of these things way too often in the gym. It basically comes down to being courteous and self aware. Don't be disruptive.

The gym should be a fun place to get a great workout. Talk, laugh, wear your favorite muscle T. Just be aware of the others around you and they need to be able to hear and have a great workout too. Don't make it awkward for others.

What did I miss? What are some of the worst gym offenses you've seen?

Just a flesh wound

Tonight at tumbling I bled all over one of the rainbow tumbling mats. It was awesome.

I was working on a bridge kick-over on the rainbow mats. They're pretty primary colors.

The instructor walks over to me. I'm probably doing something wrong.

Her eyes get wide and her voice is a little more emphatic than her normal super excited tone.

"Are you bleeding!?" she asks me.

I blink. I don't think I'm bleeding. I'm certainly not hurt. I'm fine.

And then I wonder if I am bleeding. OMG. What did I do?

There is indeed blood on the yellow part of the rainbow mat.

"Am I bleeding?" I ask. 

She inspects me.

Do I have a compound fracture? Is there bone sticking out somewhere? What is wrong with me?

"I think it's a mole," she finally decides. "At first I thought it was a bug bite, but it's a mole. Maybe it got rubbed on one of the mats."

"I can't see it," I apologize. Really not knowing what's going on with my back.

I think of what could have caused it. Maybe when I was working on gymnastics presses and tumbled back on to one of the mats. Really, I don't feel hurt. 

And before I know it, I've turned around and the coach has applied a band-aid to my back. Like I was a good obedient, kindergartner. Except, I'm a 31-year-old woman. But it works for me, because it would be super difficult to bandage a spot I can't even see.

Tumbling class continued mostly without incident, though one guy did accidentally kick the instructor when we was working on a back tuck. Oops Job hazard. (I think I kicked the other instructor a few weeks ago. Sorry H)

The bandage fell off when I was working on my front tuck. Thankfully, it stuck to the bottom of my foot. 

Next time I will wear a shirt that covers that pesky mole. No more skinny racer-backs for me. Or I will bring a T-shirt. And show less of my massive muscles. 

Never workout immediately following allergy shots

What happens when you get an allergy shot before arms day at the gym.
Apparently shots don't mix with handstand pushups. 

Never work out immediately following an allergy shot or four.

For some reason, I thought my allergy doctor said it was fine to workout after getting my shots. I've gotten my shots in workout clothes, even told the nurses I was going to go workout. And I have before. I got an allergy shot after work, say 5:20 and then headed to the 6 p.m. class at the gym and had no reaction.

Today, I got an allergy shot after 5, headed directly to the 6 p.m. circuit training class—and my arm broke out into a giant itchy welt.

I didn't actually notice it until I got home around 8 p.m. But it was massive. I put hydrocortisone on it, took a pictures for the doctor and vowed not to do it again.

But, you're really supposed to wait about two hours after a shot to work out—otherwise there's too much blood flow to the tissues and cause the allergens to get into your blood faster. (Thanks WebMD)

So now I know! And from now on, only lunch time shots if I'm working out in the evening.